I am currently resting on my laurels

Issue #27 seems to have satisfied my subscribers lust for new material, so I am currently resting on my laurels. During the interludes between issues of OPE, I generally do not think very deeply about things or reflect on my experience, as that might lead to deep insights that demand expression, and that leads to new work, which must be strenuously avoided. Subconsciously, I am probably developing new ideas for the next issue as I interact with the world around me, but consciously, I am watching Wipeout. I am also likely drunk.

Many great artists work in a similar fashion, except that they make much more money. In order to deal with the onslaught of important insights, they must have some "down time" during which they can rest their brain meat and perhaps watch people wipe out. Being a conduit for the collective unconscious can be tiring; even Dali needed to take a break now and then to stage elaborate sex circuses with dwarfs, lobsters, and Mia Farrow.

The latest (and final) email reminder to lapsed subscribers:

Hi. This is Malcolm, the OPE intern again. Issue #26 of Other People Exist (The Fifth Annual Death/Christmas Issue) mailed out yesterday, but I cannot release your copy until I have received your $24 remittance. Kurt tried to get me to mail you the issue anyway, telling me what a great subscriber you've been and saying It's not about the money, but I refused.

Kurt says the latest issue might be the best ever (as judged by Kurt). It includes such future classics as I'm Not Gay, Much and The Hipster Holocaust, as well as Kurt's annual Christmas letter. And Kurt says he tried to keep filler to an absolute minimum (though some is unavoidable). I watched him labor over this issue until his fingers were pink with wear, so I know just how good it ostensibly is.

Your $24 will do more than keep the issues flowing for the rest of Year Five. It will restore your good name in the community and seal your status as a supporter of American art, regardless of quality. Won't you renew today? Your checkbook is where you left it.

Malcolm
OPE intern

A recent email to OPE subscribers who have not yet renewed:

Dear OPE subscriber,
Hi, this is Malcolm again, the college intern at Other People Exist zine. Kurt is finishing up the 5th annual Death/Christmas issue (issue #26), and unfortunately, you are currently not on our mailing list. This is because you forgot to renew/refuse to renew/have passed away. Kurt plans to complete the issue and have it at your doorstep before Christmas Day, which falls on the 25th this year. But you must renew to receive this blessed issue.

Kurt explicitly instructed me to keep the tone of this renewal reminder professional, but I can't help mentioning the long hours I've spent waiting for the arrival of your moneys. Just because I'm imaginary doesn't mean things don't bother me.

If you prefer not to receive any more issues of OPE, simply harden your heart against my earnest request and ignore the call to support American art in an age that is so badly in need of it. And Happy Holidays!

Malcolm


Photo courtesy of Perpetual Chocoholic

Happy Half Christmas!

archived

Work begins on issue #27

Work continues on Issue #27 of Other People Exist:

Status update: Issue #28

Lost trading cards

Each morning, when I rise, I ask myself What should I do to fill the empty hours before my inevitable annihilation? The answer used to be Watch or re-watch episodes of ABC's television series Lost. Once the show ended, however, I had to find a new activity to stave off the crushing despair.

Then the folks at ButterSword posted Robin Cain's delightful Lost trading cards, and I realized making Lost trading cards could give me the illusion of purpose I've been looking for.

Below are the trading cards her work inspired me to create. Enjoy where possible:

Lost Trading Cards
Inanimate Objects Series
by Kurt