The latest (and final) email reminder to lapsed subscribers:
Hi. This is Malcolm, the OPE intern again. Issue #26 of Other People Exist (The Fifth Annual Death/Christmas Issue) mailed out yesterday, but I cannot release your copy until I have received your $24 remittance. Kurt tried to get me to mail you the issue anyway, telling me what a great subscriber you've been and saying It's not about the money, but I refused.
Kurt says the latest issue might be the best ever (as judged by Kurt). It includes such future classics as I'm Not Gay, Much and The Hipster Holocaust, as well as Kurt's annual Christmas letter. And Kurt says he tried to keep filler to an absolute minimum (though some is unavoidable). I watched him labor over this issue until his fingers were pink with wear, so I know just how good it ostensibly is.
Your $24 will do more than keep the issues flowing for the rest of Year Five. It will restore your good name in the community and seal your status as a supporter of American art, regardless of quality. Won't you renew today? Your checkbook is where you left it.
Malcolm
OPE intern
Kurt says the latest issue might be the best ever (as judged by Kurt). It includes such future classics as I'm Not Gay, Much and The Hipster Holocaust, as well as Kurt's annual Christmas letter. And Kurt says he tried to keep filler to an absolute minimum (though some is unavoidable). I watched him labor over this issue until his fingers were pink with wear, so I know just how good it ostensibly is.
Your $24 will do more than keep the issues flowing for the rest of Year Five. It will restore your good name in the community and seal your status as a supporter of American art, regardless of quality. Won't you renew today? Your checkbook is where you left it.
Malcolm
OPE intern
posted by Kurt | 1:36 PM
10 Comments:
That plea almost makes me wish I was a lapsed subscriber so I could renew.
Filler is good for you. Oh wait... that's fiber.
See and I am not even a lapsed subscriber because I am at a loss as to whether I should subscribe or not. But still save one for me. Real or not.
God bless.
I dont know much about Art, but I know what I Like!
i almost passed out when i saw three new posts.
no, i mean seriously...i almost did!!!
Sometimes i love you so much i could just clock you over the head and drag you into my fireplace
Hmmm....
Okay, just do one of disappointment for me. Sigh. I missed out.
Thanks for the e-mail.
God bless.
OK, OK! it's in the mail
I think I work with that guy... or his twin/clone/robot..
nice post. thanks.
thanks
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